Friday, July 6, 2012
One Particular Harbor
Greetings y'all:
So I frittered yesterday away, 'twas my last day of summer break before going back to work. I literally just sat around reading, swimming , and if course watched " Last of the Summer Wine" on MPT. But it neglected my housework and I don't feel too bad about that choice. It also marked my last day off without my man cub. He was busy enjoying camp. Sadly when I picked him up I was in a selfish mood and didn't explore with the way I should have. He greeted me in a rather surly mood because he only got 23/26 points on his point sheet. I was pleased with , it's close to 90% and no one is perfect. I tried coming along side him, which seemed to work. For the rest of the day he whiny and that my friends is my kryptonite! I maintained calm most of the evening. We was able to practice his karate before training but was angry when I weighed his mood and decided against taking him to busy pool. He was successful at karate training. Later in the evening he continued his whining.He did not get what he wanted. We played a game I created called "calm cove" - its a deep breathing, guided imagery, time in. We closes our eyes and breathe in through our noses then blow out through our mouths , like blowing sails into a cove. A few of those then we find a cool shady place to drop anchor. Once there we are safe from the stormy emotions and pirates of positivity trying to purloin our positive energy. We let the negativity storm blow over. When we're ready we map our course for success and have regained the strength and focus to continue our journey. Basically we stop, sit together, breathe together, let him plot identify his issue and plot his new course, then sail forth together. He learns to be the captain of his ship. It also helps me plot my course and shows him I won push him away but will pull him in when hes upset. I don't k ow , it seems to be working thus far. Maybe, as Jimmy Buffet sings" we all need that " one particular harbor "
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What a great method for calming. I'd done something similar when I worked in an E.D. classroom (not called B.D. classrooms out here - don't know about in MD). It's much more successful than battling it out.
ReplyDeleteI'll tell you a secret, too - I do the same thing (stop, close your eyes, take a breath in through your nose, out through your mouth - only I just model the behavior and don't say those words other than "OK, stop," with my sometimes hot-tempered husband (on those rare occasions when his guff is up). It works like magic (mostly) for taking the heat out of the emotion.
Love your safe harbor imagery though. I may steal that from you if I ever have the opportunity to work with kids again.
It's amazing how the simple involuntary action of breathing can nourish the mind , body and soul . I like that you model conscience breathing in the face of anger. I think it's best to project calm when faced with agitation. It can be difficult but your conscience breathing is sure to calm you and prevent you from giving negative energy to a stressful situation. Nice job !
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