If you can't stand the heat get into the kitchen.

Greetings y'all :

Yesterday was yet another scorcher on the east coast. Yes we got the kitchen cleaned which only led to some baking. Yes 100f plus humidity and we baked a nice loaf of multi-grain honey wheat in the bread maker and later a batch of red velvet whoopie pies in the oven. We enjoy baking, it feeds us , feeds others and baking is making memories.

Gee our life is golden huh? No quite the opposite. But Ken you frame your life as one of constant joy. Thanks for noticing that I believe perception is reality. That is we have our struggles. Like when he wanted to spend his Toys-R-Us gift card and we wondered around for 90 minutes only to have him throw a fit because I won't allow any toy guns in the house. Seems he perseverated on water pistols and virtually any thing that was a gun. I remained calm , which is hard for me especially in that store with a rather upset child. Remaining calm is the key. It was difficult because we were tired and the store overloads our senses. I calmly set my stopwatch and began the journey out the store. He continued his fit in the car and all the way home. None of my tricks worked so I realized he had to hit the wall. When he finally calmed down and we processed I showed him it took just under thirty minutes from start to finish. We talked about what can be accomplished if given thirty minutes of free time and how that thirty minutes of anguish can not be retrieved it can a thirty minute lesson on life, not a loss. Life is suffering and if we embrace it as lessons we can grow.

This morning Xander opted to throw a fit because he wasn't getting what he wanted to breakfast and was directed to clean up a large mess he created. Unfortunately I was not calm. That's like throwing fuel on a fire. Yes I'm human and he will need to learn with various attitudes and reactions but it's fine line within in this house. By becoming upset I am no longer the cool calm an collected captain of the ship navigating rough seas. I am a perturbed panic captain I end up making those on board fret and stress.

Once I did my deep breathing and reframed his work as a game ( see how many Legos you can put away in ten minutes) we turned the corner. I came along side him and not at him. It is quite difficult at times. I get tired and cranky and sadly I have flashback to my married life. I had to maintain because if I got upset things got explosive and I oft times ended up injured psychologically and physically. Too much pressure to be the calm in the storm. Fortunately with man cub I have seen considerable growth out him when I stay calm. He is showing self regulation capabilities. One child , but from two gene pools. Are his tantrums the result of one set of genes? Absolutely not ! I had a temper as a child and I am charged with teaching and guiding him through his minefield of emotions

I don't know, I just don't know. Today I feel like I have more questions than answers. Oh well all I can say is whoopie ! I have pies!

Thanks for listening to my ramblings today