Personal Challenges

Greetings y'all :

Yes I took yesterday off from writing the blog and for a very good reason. I overslept . OK so it's s not so good reason.

Brief recap then y'all . Wednesday was quite wonderful . We both had good days at school. Young Master Robinson likes doing his homework in my classroom after school. This year he has been conducive to my help if he has questions or to my redirection if he needs it. Ahh I'll take it !

Wednesday evening was library to get his first "Black Eye Susan" book. He's challenged himself to read all the grade 4-6 books and grade 6-9 books and a handful of the high school books (which I will pre-read for content, subject and language) . Last night he read chapter 4 of "Blue Comet" aloud to me and started a dictionary. The dictionary is going to be words he encounter but does not know the meaning. After library we swam , or rather as he said - he trained. We encountered a trio of children who have traditionally bullied Zander. These children followed him wherever he moved. Zander was being respectful and mindful of they right to play in a community pool. They jumped on him, threw balls at him, hit him and jumped in front of him. Zander would apologize and find a new location. We both told the children that Zander was training and to please be mindful that he is giving them space, but alas twas to no avail. At one point the oldest pointed his finger at me and made shooting sounds while his mother laughed. We remained calm and I ended up swimming laps as well. We choose peace.

Thursday was another great day too. Zander had some tough homework . Glad I've taught third grade math and know what is expected for BCRs . I was proud of my little man for working diligently and accepting when erred. Like I mentioned we read for about two hours but after swimming of course. We are mourning the pending ending of the pool season. Guess where we'll be this weekend?

Happy Friday one and all! Remain present because the future is just round the bend. It's the next breath.

Thanks for reading y'all !

IF by Rudyard Kipling

This ,quite simply is for my son. I love you son, I believe in you . 

IF 

If you can keep your head when all about you
Are losing theirs and blaming it on you;
If you can trust yourself when all men doubt you,
But make allowance for their doubting too:
If you can wait and not be tired by waiting,
Or, being lied about, don't deal in lies,
Or being hated don't give way to hating,
And yet don't look too good, nor talk too wise;

If you can dream---and not make dreams your master;
If you can think---and not make thoughts your aim,
If you can meet with Triumph and Disaster
And treat those two impostors just the same:.
If you can bear to hear the truth you've spoken
Twisted by knaves to make a trap for fools,
Or watch the things you gave your life to, broken,
And stoop and build'em up with worn-out tools;

If you can make one heap of all your winnings
And risk it on one turn of pitch-and-toss,
And lose, and start again at your beginnings,
And never breathe a word about your loss:
If you can force your heart and nerve and sinew
To serve your turn long after they are gone,
And so hold on when there is nothing in you
Except the Will which says to them: "Hold on!"

If you can talk with crowds and keep your virtue,
Or walk with Kings---nor lose the common touch,
If neither foes nor loving friends can hurt you,
If all men count with you, but none too much:
If you can fill the unforgiving minute
With sixty seconds' worth of distance run,
Yours is the Earth and everything that's in it,
And---which is more---you'll be a Man, my son! 

Rudyard Kipling

Phelpsian effort

Greetings y'all ;

Well I suppose our reflection and self flagellation paid off for at least one day. Yesterday we both had good days. It didn't start off that way though. I woke up early to get me time , but a few moments later so did he. I refused to give up the helm of the ship and stayed on course. He chose the path of tantrum. I remained calm and tried all my strategies to redirect him. He wanted to play dad tv but that channel was disconnected. When it was time to leave I merely said " I'm leaving in five minutes" he said "ok I need to brush my teeth, Love you!" We both went forth and had terrific Tuesdays.

Last evening was relaxing, math games, and swimming. Zander put forth a Phelpsian effort and swam one hundred laps in the pool! We , the life gaurs and I,were impressed! It's amazing seeing his independence manifest itself in a positive effort. Yes he challenged me to swim one hundred laps on our next pool visit. He's got no concept that I'm an old man.

We came home from that an snuggled up listening to Matilda on Audiobook, after reading to each other for an hour.

I'll take this day, like every other, burn it into my memory cells. Some days you eat the bear, some days the bear eats you and somedays you share a meal with the bear.

Have a wonderful Wednesday ! " Have a fruitful day" jimmy buffet


Thanks for reading folks !

Non malfeasance

Greetings y'all ;

"I hear babies cry and I watch them grow. They'll learn much more than I'll ever know . And I think to myself - what a wonderful world "

Well folks one down and just one hundred seventy nine days left until the end of the school year. Yes counting down is controversial but it helps me realize how precious each moment if each day is. Personally I had a good first day of school. I made a few mistakes that are correctable and I'm blessed with working with a great teacher who knows how to run a classroom and teach me as well as the students. Its a pleasure watching and learning from him. Crikey I'm not even the best dressed man anymore .

Zander had a long day. Great day except for his meltdown o'clock crisis. He wanted his afternoon snack to avoid his melt down , didn't happen plus it came an hour earlier because he was up an hour earlier. We , no scratch that , he had a crisis and now has an earlier meltdown o'clock. He knows he has to push through it and get his snack at the end of the day.

Karate was challenging for him as well. He only had a light dinner before going and was tired. He had trouble with his self control during sparring, again. Once again I looked at a parent and told her " we have two minutes until karate is over, they will run late and in four minutes he will lose it."Four minutes later he lost it. He was given additional exercise at the end and then threatened with losing his stripes.

Ok I can't defend his actions. I do know I will make a better schedule for us and follow my instincts regarding his ability to participate in evening activities. Again his action have consequences for him, my job is ensure the consequences are natural and logical and are non malfeasance while helping him to learn and still believe in himself. He is brave,he is kind, he wise, yet he is still a babe.

I believe in you my son, I believe in you. I pray you believe in yourself and learn to accept imperfection in yourself and others.

Thanks for reading again today,

ALL things are possible!

Greetings y'all :

Yesterday was an epic fail on my part . Nope don't try convincing me otherwise. I simply blew it . I was not a good captain of out ship . I saw an ice berg and went full steam into it then blamed the ice berg and the crew. The reality is I failed miserably. I chose my actions and reactions but neglected to be proactive.

The Dalai Lama teaches us that anger comes from selfishness, put others first and anger will cease. Life is suffering and suffering comes from holding onto expectations. Most of the time I do that, I've stated that the universe is much happier when I step aside and focus on others. I let go of personal expectations. Yesterday I dropped the ball. I , dogmatically held onto personal expectations. I let my stress and anxiety out of their Pandorian box. Had I taken a few moments to listen, think , observe, and feel empathy I would have nipped it in the bud and this blog would be different because the day would have been different. But this my friends is my reality, warts and all

A very dear friend reminded me I am a Pisces as is my progeny. We are a sensitive people, sensitive to others emotions. When I say I must be mindful of my mood that is what I mean. If I feel or project any emotion my wonderful progeny picks up on it. That includes calm and anxiety. This insight helped show a new path of healing. We are both sensitive to vibes and I've been able to subconsciously work it out. Zander however is merely eight and half years old ( at this in this lifetime) and was not aware of that hyper-sensitivity to moods in a room. Now we both know to be aware of it and to be wary of it. He can now focus in on the calm force and not feed or feed off the wild energy of others. Infuse others with calm.

I do not absolve others or myself of actions, reactions or choices. I reflect on my thoughts, words and action . I attempt greater understanding of root causes. Change occurs deep with in not on the surface. Tis time to take the helm of our ship and steer clear of icebergs. To ensure the crew they have a calm and capable captain.

My progeny commences his journey into third grade today. Yes I wonder where the time went. But as he so sweetly said this morning " wow I'm a third grader! When I was a baby I didn't even know this was possible!" Son - with you ALL things are possible! Godspeed young man!

Forward

Greetings y'all :

So yesterday is history but oh what wonderful day it was! We had old fashioned morning of visiting the farmers market, book thing, a local park thats been restored then home for swimming , snuggling and reading.

We scored to great books on tape sets at BookThing* ! We found Roald Dahl reading four of his books and also found Alice in Wonderland, Jungle Book and Aesop . Not the Disney butchered versions but the unabridged real versions. We also stumbled upon a few excellent books. Gotta love a free book exchange coop!

I admit I already messed up today's schedule. Friends meeting is still on summer schedule so we missed our service. I'm a tad discombobulated now. I think we both needed to get our God on today. Alas no use dwelling on it , we'll just meditate here. But I confess I get greater clarity and a personal message at meeting, even if no one rises to speak. I'll hold you all in the light as we progress through our lives.

Tomorrow is back to school for us. There is a palpable sense of excitement and anxiety for both of us. I see that I need to clean the house prior to diving into the rat race and he wants to hold onto summer time, ok I do to. Reality stinks - ha ha ha. Perhaps he's stressed that I said after today the tv is going bye- bye again for awhile ?

Forward is the only direction we know so time for some meditation,housework,swimming and ???

Open to improvement

Greetings y'all :

Not sure where to start today. I apologize for no post yesterday, no excuse. I had a lot to digest but still , I apologize.

Thursday itself was a typical day of teacher week at school. Constant change and preparation. Kids I hope you realize the amount of work, effort , dedication and love teachers put into getting the classroom and lessons ready. I am humbled by my co- workers past and present and the thousands of educators I've never met. Go forth and guide these young minds to higher levels of thinking.

Thursday evening A-Rob and I went swimming then to karate training. My son was excited to be the first Robinson to do flips into the pool. I'm a coward with no hops, never could do flips and ain't starting now. Mowgli on the other hand, well his nickname is Mowgli - enough said. I was impressed with his coachability . He took directions well, from both his dear ol dad who was about to have a coronary and the very helpful lifeguard. That's not a typo the lifeguard was in the pool and helped teach my son how to do flips. He also wants to work with my son on his butterfly stroke. Zander is open to improvement.

Now I mentioned karate and on my last post that I promised him I would watch more closely. Thursday evening I was chatting with another parent, it's nice to find folks with similar attitudes and who see the best in my son, who see us struggle and know that is just child rearing and growing up. I'd just said he's come far but has a long journey ahead, that sportsmanship is still his krytonite. When right on cue his team loss a competition, he fell to the mat wailing , a loud soulful, plaintiff wail! They beckoned me to pull him and regroup him. I walked in and he walked out with me. He appeared inconsolable, yet he sat on my lap and I literally kissed away his tears while doing some reflective listening. When his mind was quieter we did our quiet cove thing and unloaded our negative emotions of the past and worked on the here and now. He returned to his training and was stellar. On the way home we briefly revisited the events and he pin pointed what happened, how he thought about it, how those thoughts made him feel and how he acted on those feelings. He reminded me they are his thoughts, feelings and actions and he ought to be in control of them. Atta boy!

That evening I talked to a wonderful advisor (Susan Stiffleman*) who helped me put things in perspective. Without her I doubt I would have come up with quiet cove or time ins. She reminded me of patterns in our lives and we all need self care. I recently realized much of my child's behavior in school has been because he gets my undivided attention at home. That is in part because I didn't have a sense of validation growing up and I don't want to miss a second of his precious life. Perhaps I've over compensated and smother. You may recall I've been working on his ability to self regulate and self entertain the last few weeks. Again a journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step. She pointed my need to maintain my mental well being and gave some good techniques for getting my important me time while teaching him his and remaining close.

Susan really opened a door in my mind I didn't know was there: patterns of how we were raised and our perceptions. I love my folks and think they did the best job they could with me. I wasn't an easy child. I was an other wise thinker in a house of conservative thinkers. They did a great job with me but I was a different creature. I also had a sibling by learned self entertainment because I never really fit in. All that helped forge who I am today. Yes the hardest steel is forged in a fire. I'm by no means hard but I am strong.

I'm a lot of things but a great man and perfect father aren't on the list. That doesn't make me less of man or parent. It makes me human, a mere humble human trying to learn and grow. Part of that is remaining present and reviewing or reflecting upon the past as means to continue the good things and modify that which needs improvement. I don't consider that beating myself up , I view it as fine tuning.

Yesterday Zander met his new teacher and his classroom. He is quite excited. He's excited to be in third grade and to finally have us back in the same school. I'm kinda jazzed myself !

Thanks for stopping by and reading today.

*
www.parentingwithoutpowerstruggles.com

Young Cheesy

Greetings y'all;

Aww Thursday is here at last ! The panic day of the teacher week. Been thinking we have time and then suddenly realize we have two days to prepare and lots of meetings to wrap up.... Gulp! Fortunately I work with an amazing teacher and we both sorta keep our stress level to a minimum.

You know it's funny but after I posted on yesterdays late blog we went to karate and A-Rob got wound up. Not out of control more like excited eight year old boy. He loss a race ( we've told him about a kajillion times to look at the finish line not the other racers or the mirror) fell to the floor for a moment then looked at me like " rut roh , I'm in trouble" Well played young cheesy ( he called himself that one) because now the ball is in my court. How do I react? Disapproving look? Are and finger wag? Naw I drew a deep breath and and smiled, chortled and made a fish swimming sign. He smiled back and had a great rest of training. The gesture was to remind him he is fish and swim , they tend not to win foot races. We love hand gestures , positive ones , and non verbal cues. They are quick, easy, and don't draw attention. It worked well yesterday but it was dodgy . Not because of him, he just missed his pop but because I was cranky and had to change my perspective. I also broke a solemn vow I made with my young man. I promised to watch him during his karate training but I focused on talking to adults instead. Mowgli noticed I wasn't watching his every move and was frustrated. I apologized to him , bad dad :( I tried making it up to him by setting up some hang out time with his friends from karate. I refuse to say play date !

Folks please review the the websites I suggest I read a mountain of info and pass on very little. I will be more conscious of recommending more sources. I rely heavily on Susan Stiffleman's www.parentingwithoutpowerstruggles.com
and empowering parents. Ms Stiffleman mirrors and reinforces my parenting style. I give her full credit for getting us started with our boating analogies and for "coming along side rather than at my child" thank you Ms. Stiffleman .


Ok time to finish baking some bread, start learning how to knit and coffee. My first mate awaits the his captain .

Thanks for reading again today.

Parenting without power struggles

Greetings y'all :

Y'all know I have a pretty extensive background in special education and live with a quirky and exuberant young lad. I read a plethora of books and have found one that helped Mowgli and I turn the corner. It's Parenting without Power Struggles by Susan Stiffleman. I would suggest this  book to any parent or educator .  No I receive no benefit from this link or suggestion other than helping folks with their child rearing duties.

Like a duck on a pond

Greetings y'all :

Ha thought I forgot about you didn't ya? Well I was just a lazy bones this morning and had trouble dragging my carcass out of bed. I guess the joy of hearing my friend was ok and talking with her helped relax me a bit and reduce my stress. The joy of hearing from another friend with good nutritional info for man cub. The joy of seeing another friend falling in love with her kid. The joy of seeing a another friend come through a troublesome patch with a smile on her face and in her heart. The joy of having my son be so spot on good and loving helped reduce my stress. The joy of an energetic swim after work helped reduce my stress. Hey wait a minute I must've been stressed. I suppose I live my life like the duck on the pond, calm above the surface but paddling like crazy under the surface to stay afloat and move forward.

Yesterday was another amazing day in a series of amazing days! Zander was once a again on point ! We still really miss each other but next week I'll have my students and he'll have his new class and the reality of class work (gulp). He loves to learn and has a great teacher so let's see, no use worrying about it. We'll take it one day at a time . Today he's been brilliant if not a tad blue. He misses me. I felt sad but proud he was able to articulate that with our acting up !

He became quite jubilant when he got two packages from an angel. Junior mint has expressed a desire to learn how to knit. I have no experience with that but a wonderful friend sent him needles, yarn and a book to get him started. Talk about random kindness and a loving gesture! The boy is stoked to commence knitting . It will teach patience and following directions . Thank you for the thoughtful gift - you know who you are and you read this blog every day. He brought some yarn, a pair if needles and the book to his therapy and is getting the counselor to help him get started.

Folks not much left to say , sorry for the late post but not sorry I slept well. Do a random act of kindness and gratitude today. Even if it's a smile at a stranger. Let your light shine !

Rich hearts

Greetings y'all :

Well yesterday went very well across the board and God willing today will be a continuance of the same. That concludes today's blog . Please return your trays to their original upright position.

Nerts y'all never fall for that.

With my continued assignment in my same classroom it genuinely felt like I was on spring break . It's nice to return to the scene of the crime . Figuratively speaking of course. Twas nice to chat with old colleagues again. I let the summer incident go into the box marked history and sealed shut . Seems most others did too. Tis good to be around professionals. I'm looking forward to another great year with an outstanding lead teacher. I'll learn a lot this year.

Now let's talk junior mint. Hmmm all I can say is ..... He's awesome! He did excellent yesterday during the day and was incredibly focused during karate training. He had his listening ears on too! He had a a very brief but minor outburst , used an attention seeking word, then walked away. When he returned he was fine. I chose to acknowledge his courage and wisdom to walk away and calm down within a few minutes, but also pointed out the language was not acceptable. We , ok he, figured out its better to walk before we talk and to use other words. Yes we snuggled up and read at that point. I can understand being tired and missing me. But the language was not ok . I admire him for the way he handled everything. It literally took less than ten minutes to go from out burst to snuggle up. He just had to figure out he was tired and missed his papa bear.

Today ? Who knows but I have high hopes, as per usual. I repeat that we are financially poor but our hearts are rich with love. I love you little man!

Thanks for reading again today. Folks I do wanna apologize for typos, very unprofessional I know. Believe it or not I do this from my pesky iPhone. Yes I type this blog from a cell phone.

The joy of being in Love

Greetings y'all :

Aww the start of a new school year. Every year we are offered fresh beginnings, tis grand. Life is rife with new chances. Continue to slog forward, fly forward, meander forward etc... just keep moving. The best way, in my humble opinion, is to stay present. We can't alter the past, only learn from it!. The future will take care of itself, no use being anxious about that which you can not control. With all that said I sure am gonna miss spending all day with my man cub. I'd love to have the money to home school but alas I must work.

I was blessed with a low stress day with my little man and with talking to several friends. One who is going through things that would stop a mere mortal , another I hadn't talked to in months, and others who know how to handle life gracefully and not so gracefully but never quit. After years of isolation having that friendship base is humbling.

I am fortunate that this year I know my assignment, I know the teacher I'm working with and I know the students. I understand my role and am fortunate. In previous years I'd known my students or assignment but not both. I tell ya I'm on a great team, and is humbling starting the year on it. However, I wish I had a few more weeks to get Junior Mint prepped for third grade. He's come a long way this summer. As excited and comfortable as I am with my assignment I'm that nervous for him. The bonus is that we are back in the same school again after a terribly stressful year apart.

I have to believe his new teacher in his new school will finally be a good match. I know the teachers are wonderful and have to trust this will be a good fit. As he said " daddy I just need to try my best but my mistakes are mine. You don't get credit for them, I own them" We revisited the summer and the chain of events. Actions and reactions. Cause and effect. That daddy is not daddy until after the bell rings . That daddy will not defend poor choices but will defend inequalities. He's an otherwise thinker with a ton on his mind. But since he's been med free I've seen him smile and laugh more, listen and talk (re: feelings and thoughts )more , do things without being told and the reward he seeks is my approval! He's even taken giant leaps forward regarding self control self regulation, and acceptance of life. He reminded me " oh we'll I still have like two million more seconds and moments today"

I believe in my son because I believe in our relationship. Yesterday was my last day of summer break. That is usually a day of ennui and stress. Instead it was a day of snuggles and giggles and playing and swimming. Yes it was 73 and rainy , so of course we went swimming. I can not stop the hands of time. Ugh I loathe clocks , but that's another blog for another day. By golly I will treasure each nano second with my amazing son but will not stand in his way of making his own mark on the world. Heck he's ready planning on being in the 2020 summer Olympic Games! Then the 2024, 2028,2032 .... Who am I to block his dreams ? I may have to initiate a PayPal or online donation to Zander's Olympic dream . He chosen Meadowbrook for his swim team.... I'm trying to stay a step ahead of the basic bills. But I will do whatever it takes to set him up for success in whatever he chooses, where ever his path leads him,I'll be there.

Just as the sun rises each day to wash away the darkness we must rise, face and embrace each new moment of each new day. So I can choose to focus on not having all day with my little buddy until the weekend or I can be thankful for the moments we've had and look forward to more. I will opt for the latter. I keep harping on it , and refuse to apologize , but I love, admire, adore, like and am in love with my son. When he was born I fell in love with him, I had know idea that feeling could grow in spite of our ups and our oops. He is my angel sent from heaven but holding my hand on this earthly realm.

Thanks for reading again today folks !

TEAM

Greetings y'all :


"Do not go gentle into that good night,
Old age should burn and rave at close of day;Rage, rage against the dying of the light." Dylan Thomas

Why the quote today? Curious little monkey today aren't you . Good remain curious, it will enrich your soul. I chose this quote because today is the last day of summer break. Yay I get to make money ! Boo I have to leave my constant companion and teacher , the one who has my heart and soul, my angel who looked down from heaven said " I choose him to be my papa " being with my son is enriching, frustrating , joyful, and exhilarating. We have our ups and downs and each other. I have learned to be a better friend , son, father and educator and I give credit to my progeny. Had we not struggled I doubt if I'd grown as much. He keeps me young and young at heart.

So yes I return to work tomorrow. The good news is Zander and I will finally be back in the same school and I am paired with an amazing teacher. Seriously folks we have a great flow in the classroom and since we are starting off from day one I believe we will have a fun, challenging but stellar year. Zander knows I am Mr.Robinson while on the clock. He is apprehensive about a new school and about being in third grade. I believe in my little guy! We are a good team and he knows I will support him when need be but will also support the staff when he is in the wrong.

Yesterday was one of them all day love affairs at the pool. Three straight hours of water volley balk and water polo/ great work out! Not sure what today will offer us but will keep an open mind.

I spoke briefly about us team and will leave you with a pithy saying about teams. (I know there is a literary term for this but not sure if anagram is quite correct so I will accept feedback from my wise readership)
TEAM

Together
Everyone
Achieves
More

I am humbled to be part of a great team at work and to be on a stupendous team with my Junior Mint!

Time to drink my coffee and face the day ahead. Thanks for reading again today folks.

Building confidence and self esteem

Greetings y'all:

Aww another great day with my son is in the books. A little swimming , my MRI results(not satisfied with this workers comp thing- yep it's inflamed, good luck see ya in two weeks. Return to normal duty but stay off it and rest ), and back to swimming. We watched a bit if the ravens game. Glad I don't get upset over sports especially pre- season. Even Zander remained calm watching that fiasco of a football game.

The glory of yesterday was watching my son play sweetly by himself at the pool but knowing I was watching - big step big boy! He's got the confidence to quietly figure things out but know I am there to always support him. I began to see this in him when I defended him a few weeks ago. Yesterday while we drove home on back roads with cars in front of us the gentleman behind us tailgated us, revved his engine, blasted his music and was still able show me with his hand he thought I was #1! Not sure why he used his long finger. I flashed him the peace sign ;) He was actually scaring my son and I was nervous about an angry driver behind us. I told Mowgli I felt sorry for the man but he does not have permission to take my energy. The driver yelled a few obscenities at us including the F-bomb. The lesson Zander learned was to remain calm and if some one is aggressive give space and love but don't feed into it. Don't give them the audience they seek. When we got out of the car at our destination Zander said " I wanted to punch that guy, nobody talks to my dad like that . But you shrugged it off and said nice things about him and never got angry. You're still happy "Yep we hugged, walked hand in hand and I responded " life is impermanent , the angry person needs love but doesn't have permission to make me angry, may as well let him go. I choose peace and a good afternoon with my son"

Last night was a stupendous evening. What ? A stupendous evening ? No way! Way ! I know - hard to believe isn't it? Well as some of y'all know earlier this week I disconnected and removed the tv. I am considering no tv in the Robinson household. Well when I attempted , albeit half heartily, to reconnect the idiot box I was unsuccessful. Zander , you know the boy society says is ADHD and can't focus , offered to look at it. I acquiesced . I said I believe in you son,go for it. He tried and failed , then tried and failed , then tried and failed. He said I can't do this, you help daddy. My response was I'm happy with no tv and you can and will do this - I believe in you. So he tried and failed, tried and failed and tried and succeeded! He shouted " I'm a technician " and danced!!! Ok we both danced!

He will always remember the day he fixed the tv and he was only eight years old. I know because I remember designing steps for our pool when I was about 14 . My father is pretty handy and tried several designs that didn't quite work. I tried offering my design but my dad was still working on his ideas. Eventually I just built it- successfully ! The bonus is that he rejoiced in my success! Guess that set the foundation for yesterday .

One of the things I've learned about living with a quirky and exuberant wee one is to give projects. Not busy work per se but things that the house hold and family needs and are confidence and self esteem boosters. Engagement and validity are beautiful things.

Stay tuned for our next adventure!

Thanks for reading today folks!

Piscean Pool Rats

Greetings y'all :

Happy Friday, usually I'd be much more excited but it's back to the old salt lick on Monday. I miss some of my co-workers and students but I also see where being with junior mint all day for a another week or so would benefit us both . Yes I'm that guy ! The guy that wants to be with his child . He teaches me more than he'll realize. Yes we still have evenings and weekends but considering our summer I think more time would only enhance his chance of success.

Since I want to maximize our short time together we opted for being at the pool all day. By that I mean we opened the pool and closed the pool! Here's what I saw from my little quirky and exuberant man. He played nicely by himself and when two young ladies arrived at the pool he readily acquiesced to whatever they wanted to do and played quite nicely. After the girls left we had the pool to ourselves for about three hours. That's paradise in my book. We played and read. He ate snacks and we chilled. At one point we suddenly had an influx of bodies when 12 very excited children converged on the cement pond. Zander sat in his and decided it was best to hang out and let the others enjoy the pool. Wise choice young man! His reward? We blew bubbles for thirty minutes! He is the bubble meister meister bubble ! He blew some that drifted over the roof and trees as well. He finally wanted to get back in and said " those kids are out of control , daddy I need you to get in and play with me" shucks he was right! None of the kids was over ten but the language was PG 13 or even R :( . It was neat having him see, identify , label inappropriate behavior.

Our hiccup was when we played a game at it kept at a tie score. Still working on sportsmanship and focusing frustration on problem solving not perseverating on the problem. Near the end of the day when it was just he and I and the lifeguard two young ladies arrived and felt very comfortable sitting in our chairs and on our towels as they changed for the pool. I'm telling myself those were bikini tops under the blouses they removed and places on our things. Oh the things you see when you stay at the pool all day!

The evening was quiet and cozy. A nice little dinner then snuggling and reading. His last words to me were " Daddy you read my book to me? I like your voice . I love you daddy"

I'll take this day and hold on to it !

Yeowza !

Greetings y'all :

Well folks I looks like the top troglodyte managed to not actually post yesterday's blog while simultaneously losing it in the ether world. Yeowza !!! What a maroon!

So I supposed spend a second and a succinct synopsis should be submitted. Here is the Readers Digest Condensed version of the last 48 hours or 2,880 minutes or 172,800 seconds. Life is good, God is good, my heart is light so good night. Too succinct ?

Ok Ok , sheesh tough crowd today, but I deserve after not ensuring my mindless ramblings actually posted. See because you read this I feel obligated and blessed to write my thoughts down daily ( or so apparently) . But alas there is no truly altruistic act; I benefit from revisiting , reviewing and reflecting . I write for me and anyone willing to listen err read. Meanwhile back at the ranch ...

Tuesday evening we drove home from my appointment, back roads naturally and of course top down as well. Our motto is the top is down unless there's precipitation, seems we need a new motto. It stated drizzling oh so lightly and the boy wonder said keep it down . Hmmm we made a deal next red light it would go up. So we turned on Nadira Shakoor and sang in the rain. Needless to say we drove the remaining 15 miles without a single stop light or stop am the rain increased. Being that we are Pisces we laughed and laughed.

At night the storms really began raging. The sky looked like God turned on his strobe light and cranked the music, with thunderous bass, and he danced as well in the rain. The rain and the window , the thunder an the lightening were beautifully fierce or was that fiercely beautiful? Yes of course we turned out the lights , opened the windows and watched God TV. Best show around and it doesn't cost a thing accept time.

Yesterday was MRI for my ankle/foot , the pool and Mowgli had karate . We followed that with a trip to the library. Raise you paw if you like getting lost in the library? The pool was hilarious but heartwarming! Man Cub had equipment malfunctions , goggle were not cooperating so fish boy spent the first 90 minutes adjusting, tugging, and figuring it out. I offered advice but he is self reliant at times (some may call it defiant but I shall reframe it as a positive attribute with him which in turn makes it easier to work with) . He finally figured it and fit to jump and play for an hour or so. My other lesson I am teaching him is to use self reliance for self entertainment. It was painful not swimming with him, but he proved he can play by himself nicely.

Now folks you know I love playing with an being with my sol Invectus more than anything else but I've been worried that some of his attention seeking behaviors are a product of my constant attention on him. He can't get that in school, so we set yesterday up as something he can refer back to : hey I can sit in class for thirty minutes and not be the center of attention. I guess this is another product of being a single child to a helicopter parent that is in love with his progeny. He can't change until I change.

We've been reading The Essential Dalai Lama to each other at bedtime for the last week. It's been amazing, the reading and snuggling and the way Man Cub absorbs and thinks about it. Reading a book together and discussing it is a fascinating activity. I hear the voice inside my head ( I'll wait for your punch line on that _______) when I read but it's biased from my song line, experiences , and view point. Hearing a different perspective is eye opening, mind opening and heart opening.

Today is our last unscheduled week day of summer vacation. So I'm off to spend it with junior mint . It's our tech free day ... Heading off the grid in

3.....2......1....

Thanks for reading

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Spiffy and the Beast !

Greetings Y'all:

Welcome back my friends to the show that never ends. Yes I took a brief hiatus from the blog. I meant to take a break on Sunday but as usual was a day late. Obla di Obla da ... Life goes on.


Let's see what's happened ? Nothing - so good night .


Bad joke ? Oh well, a bad joke is better than no joke. I'd rather laugh at how bad something is than not laugh at all. But that's just me... It's how I roll. Said while typing with a gangsta lean . Ha ha ha

So Sunday was a day seared into our memory cells. You know us - it's better to make memories than pine away the hours, days, months, and years. Life is impermanent and fleeting so enjoy the moments! Sunday I celebrated all things Man Cub! We watched the last day of the Olympic Games and swam for hours ! He is the next and first Zander Robinson! He put forth a Phelpsian effort winning 33 out of 35 swim races! Even beating kids twice his age! The two he loss were to a boy that is fifteen and would only race in the three foot section. The other boy ran and leaped , refusing to actually swim , and had two kids block Zander! He still only won by a finger tip.

I'm not gonna lie; it felt great watching him! The other children grew tired of losing even when he gave head starts or used one arm . They called him a beast - which may be his nick name with the kids ( hmmm Spiffy and the Beast). They said he's half man and half fish! His response was ... " my dad's my coach" then looked at me, flashed I love you and called out "I love you dad" then returned to his aquatic over achievements !

How do you finish a day like that? By watching the closing ceremonies ( well what NBC thought we should see--- grrrr) and dancing and dancing and dancing ! My poor neighbor below us! We watched some of the amazing Persied Meteor showers out Mowgli's window as we snuggled up to end the day.

Yesterday was much more chilled out. But I learned he is a young man who wants to do the right thing. All he wanted was more time with his papa bear. I failed him because I perseverated on getting rest. It was a few hours of stress and no rest. Yet I knew to give him all my energy for a bit then take my time. I was selfish and fought against the universe. Guess who won that one ? Life is suffering and suffering is holding onto expectations , not staying in the moment. Well played universe- I suppose that was my lesson du jour because suffering is a learnable moment. Well played !

I was reminded that time is fleeting as is life. Embrace the full flavors each day offers; the sweet and sour and hot and spicy and cool and refreshing. Embrace life's cornucopia of emotions and feelings. Savor each day and moment and remember its better to make memories than wonder what if?

Thanks for reading again folks .

Magical night

Greetings y'all ;

So yesterday I dropped the ball on patenting . I woke man cub up so I could run out coffee since I had run out of coffee. First mistake - should have let him sleep. We both ended up cranky. Ok so some days are like that . Ya see that may be true but why throw gas on the fire.

He feeds off mood. I was pretty laid back until he had a tantrum in the store . I could have avoided the tantrum. There I said it. I was not proactive I was reactive. He pushed all my buttons and I failed as the captain of our ship.

It set the tone for the day. We were a bit snappy during the day and I saw a child I hadn't seen in a long time. Hey he's eight , he's a little person with. If emotions but still has just a little bucket to hold the emotions . Sometimes they over floweth.

We did swim for a bit and watched the Olympic Games. He fell asleep and couldn't wake up for the meteor showers . Oh well maybe tonight - early to bed, early to rise ? The universe made me proud by showing off Jupiter, Venus and Luna in the eastern sky while meteors shot across the western sky .

We all need to be humbled occasionally .

Thanks for reading.

Self reliant

Greetings y'all ;

Ahh Saturday , yes it means something even when summer break is only two weeks long. Tonight is the peak for the Persiod (sic) Shower so go forth , find a dark spot and gaze up at the August sky. She the beauty and magic of the universe. Life is fleeting so seize the day , stay in the moment Wow I usually save my pontificating for the closing. Oh well it is what it is. Per chance my heart is just lighter today?

For those who know, my sweet baboo is quite competitive and is genuinely working on sportsmanship as well as accepting the decisions of adults . That last one one is hard for a little person who is self reliant. See notice how I reframed that from oppositional or defiant to a positive - self reliant. There in lies the key ! How do we view others ? What labels do we use? How does that pigeon hole others ? Yesterday I told Mowgli he may lead the way and lead the day: I would have veto power but I trusted him .


He wanted to spend his Toys -R-Us gift card so we ventured forth to the land of toys and hyper stimulation. He had two stipulations 1. No weapons 2. Remember to shop wisely and consider future costs and durability . He got there and wanted water pistols or NERF guns I said no , just plain and simple no - no argument or frustration . He said that's right no weapons and you don't negotiate with children. He finally chose a RC car but realized the batteries only last one hour and he couldn't afford additional batteries. Impressive so far don't ya think ? Eventually we came home with a RC snake and a free bucket of jungle animals ! Well played sir !

His next stop was Aldis , a local and quite inexpensive grocer. He wanted some foods I don't permit and again just moved on He chose dinner and a snack . Next we made it home to play with new toy , watch the Olympic Games and Ellen. Then off to the pool. I know can you believe he chose swimming?

He actually let me sit and read before jumping in and playing. Xander is learning to entertain himself - another giant leap forward. Once we played there was no whining or screaming! We played baseball and he would say oh well good play dad! The life guard was amazed . I explained it was why he had listen to the fits before and they pop up , just have to be proactive. It's also a Gould idea to work with others strength and help them feel autonomous!

The evening was grand- more Olympic Games and conversation. It's hard to fathom he is just eight or that he is already eight . Sorry as he says almost eight and a half.

Today we will ????? Probably start with a run back to the grocer since my sons man brained and blonde father forgot to get coffee once again. Maybe it's a sign to stop drinking or it's a sign I'm losing my mind . Oh well not sure I like either choice.

Remember to watch the night sky but also keep your eyes open to other lights bringing you messages.

Thanks for reading folks!

Stepping out of the comfort zone

Greetings y'all ;

Another day another blog not sure where to start or where it's headed so hold on and enjoy the journey.

Lets begin with yesterday since today has just begun. Aww sweet memories of yesterday. We had an extremely laid back day . We ran some errands, hunted down another watermelon and swam for a few hours. He had a wonderfully focused karate training. Then we or rather he, watched the football game ( seems I am bad luck when I watch so I got to catch up with a new friend - I think I am pretty lucky with that one ). Finally we snuggled up in his room again, read and listened to the melodic sound of rain dancing on the window.

Watching and listening to storms is cause for wonderment. Seriously how can something , which has the potential for being dangerous, still be so beautiful ? Lightening sprinting across the sky to thunderous applause. Rain dancing rhythmically upon the window , tapping out the notes to nature's song, Rinsing yesterday away but offering us a new chance and a new day.

The rain may rinse the day but the memories stay. If yesterday were a day of struggles then I would say it washed the day away to help give a fresh start but alas yesterday was a wonderful day so it merely rinsed the day and gave it a better shine.

Let's start with the Xan man - he did most excellent in the pool. He was able to give me time to read before swimming. He also played quite well even when losing. Big steps big boy ! During our errands he did not ask for anything and was the worlds best helper! When I made my rare phone call he allowed me to talk without trying to be the center of attention. Big steps big boy. Again I think it comes down to understanding and responding to who he is. Positive reinforcement and coming along side him create an inspiring and productive relationship and child, punishment - not so much.

I actually stepped out of my comfort zone twice yesterday . The first time was at his karate training. I talked openly with other parents and if felt really good. I see that other parents don't view me as an abject failure based on my child's occasional tantrums. The second time was when I called a friend just because I needed to hear their voice. I loathe no make that LOATHE talking on the phone but we chatted for over an hour and I left feeling pretty good about myself. Sometimes it's nice to hear nice things,

Today it's still raining so I dare say my son and the sun are both shining but under a blanket. Folks no one knows what the day will bring so remain open and honest and ready. Keep your eyes open for those little lights that are really angels leading and guiding us.

Thanks for reading again today.

Another Magical Mystery Day

Greetings y'all ;

I decided to maintain continuity and post today. Thursday is traditionally tech free day so as a friend noted- I'm breaking my own rules.

Yesterday was another magical mystery day. We waited several hours for our apartment inspection that only lasted two minutes, seriously they were in and out in two minutes. After they breezed through we opted for Piscean poolside pursuits and swimming . Why not ?

Last night I was invited to a very special sleepover . Junior Mint realized we could see the tv in the living room from his room so he suggested to watch the Olympics from his little dude den and sleep there. It was a grand experience ! We slept for twelve hours !

Yesterday I also finally started to get to know an old acquaintance whom i am now proud to call my friend. Ahh the joy of remaining open and honest.

Short blog today but this day is looking even more positive than yesterday. I challenge you to take a chance and reach out to someone new, learn more about some one else . Let me know how it goes !

Thanks for reading!

The dreaded labels

Interesting article about how  children get labeled and mislabeled and the stygma of the labels. http://www.empoweringparents.com/blog/special-needs-and-learning-disabilities/behavior-labeling/

Joyful hearts

Greetings y'all ;

Yesterday was one of them days , one of them really good for heart and soul days. You may recall my java fiasco it we made an adventure of it. That set the tone du jour. After we returned from our predawn expedition and work out I suggested we go ahead and clean my son's room. Who knew that would elicit a four hour nap from said progeny ?

Ok that left me a few choices : nap with him, wait for him to wake up and work on the room together or tackle the black hole of his bedroom. I chose a nice combination of A and C . I snuggled and napped with him for a few minutes , my heart filled with love and I decide to start on his room. Each item I touched I did with being fully present and with love for an eight year old that has taught me a lifetime of love and given me several lifetimes of joy! Uhm naturally my little angel woke from his nap just as I was finishing his room.

We sat , I fed him lunch and we watched our favorite Brit com together. We even played some on his putting green. Then eventually went to the pool for a quick one hour dip. I still wanted to finish cleaning. Well folks I am the captain of the ship and I decided to let the good ship Robinson Boys remain docked at the pool for the rest of the day. That meant four hours of playing and exercising and laughing and at one point we both sat out to rest . I trusted him with my phone so he could listen to music. He stayed out for a long time but it was when he started singing and dancing that I thought my heart would burst with joy at his joyfulness! I even dove in the pool and swam for awhile whilst he did music therapy. Eventually other folks showed up and we all played some games. I was proud of Zander for playing and accepting when loss , may sound trivial but that's a huge step for one of his quirky and exuberant predisposition.

So that's that in a nut shell. I continued to mindfully go about my day and accomplish what I needed to. I was extremely humbled and touched by a friend I've never met. We've chatted online but she reached out with an open and honest mind and hand. It was a seemingly random moment but I know there are no random moments - but angels with messages for us. I'm still exploring what the message may be. I know because of her I began to actually read the Qur'an and attempt to ingests it meaning. Funny how I've read, studied,lived etc Christianity, Judaism,Native American, Wiccan, Hinduism, Buddhism and now Islam but they all point to treating each other with love , respect, and kindness. To humbly acknowledge our role as striving to maintain peace and love our fellow man. For me it's about a personal relationship with God/Allah/ the great spirit etc ...

The last two days Zander has been deep. He asked if he would be an animal in the next life or heaven. He said he wants to be in heaven with me but can't be that good all the time down here on earth. He asked to show off without showing off. He acknowledge having bad dreams after being mean to others. Fortunately these sweet insightful comments were spread out over the last two days. It kept the whole courtship of eddies father vibe going a little longer. It lead to multiple tender and honest moments of discussing just doing the right thing right now, have the fortitude to acknowledge our sins and ask forgiveness, to be open to others experiences so we may learn.

No matter what we do the future is coming, the past is behind us, which leaves us the present to live in.

Thanks again for stopping by and checking in on us .

Army of two !

Greetings y'all;

Yesterday was a good cleaning day. We were house proud! The living room is livable again . Today junior mint will take the lead in organizing his little dude den! I shall work for him- here's hoping this helps him take ownership of his domicile.

This morning the poor boy woke up at 3:30 with charley horses . He drank up some oj and ate a banana. It helped but the problem was ... Neither one of us could get back to sleep and I'm out of coffee. What to do ? What to do ? Well we opted for a good old fashioned adventure!

We visited about a half dozen stores looking for cans of coffee but alas no luck in the wee hours of the morning . We finally settled on a local fast food eatery whet Mowgli got a nice sandwich and I got coffee . We had to wait ten minutes because they weren't ready to serve breakfast yet and then my coffee was too hot to drink. Oh well I learned I can live with out coffee in the morning but I really enjoy the flavor.

We opted to then watch the spectacular sunrise and hit the fitness center before starting our clean up.

Just another adventurous day for the Robinson Boys and it's barely 6:15 am !

Thanks for reading about us again.

Lemons to lemonade

Greetings y'all :

Ahh another loverly day today . I've no idea what the weather will be like but I have my man cub in my life so it ought to be a splendiferous and magnificent Monday.

Yesterday was just another Robinson Boy random adventure day. He watched some of the Olympics and I scrubbed the kitchen and bathroom. We then headed out to the pool. Fabulous time I dare say! We spent a few hours of serious playful splashing about and aquatic exercising. Jeepers I love swimming and started doing some good work outs and stretching in the water not to mention copious amounts of actual swimming. Although Mowgli's latest scam is he gets to swim free style or the crawl whilst I have to go under water without using my appendages. That's just on the short races though. It's amazing how joyful it is to just jump around and play in a pool. No agendas, just gleeful play

We came home so he could get some lunch (I'm still fasting) and more Olympics and some baseball on the telly. We set back out for the poo with a large dark grey cloud looming over head. As we arrived at the pool we heard thunder - pool was cleared out for thirty minutes . Being who we are we turned right and went into to fitness center. We watched the storm through the window and watched the end of the ball game then the Olympics on the telly while working out. My little ball of energy spent his two and half hours on the elliptical machine an treadmill. Me I did some biking, resistance , free weights, treadmill and yoga. Twas my first good work out since my ankle issue. No no worries I took it light.

We finally came home and goofed around and giggled and played around. Then more Olympics - why not he'll remember seeing all these various events and the spirit and sportsmanship of them. It's not like we are sofa spuds either.

I admit I questioned my choice to fast with the heat and the calories I burned off. But then I remembered many people don't have a choice to break fast at will, they eat if and when they can. They get shelter if and when they can. It's humbling to count my blessings and thank God for what I have rather than grouse about what I don't have.

Dinner was fresh pineapple, banana , coconut water, red grapes , homemade hummus ( still rocking the spinach and roasted flax ) with carrots. I was quite sated with my repast. It's funny but I was full after just the banana and coconut water. That means a few things - first I eat too much and second time to delve into the reason why I eat too much.

My little Nemo had a superb Sunday yesterday. Was it him ? yeah mostly. Was it my reactions? Yeah partly. I chose not to be angry but to see and accept the insanity of child hood, to embrace his quirky an exuberant nature. We had some good honest talks through out the day. By not being judgmental toward him he felt easier about baring his soul. He is seeking what we all seek - validity and acceptance of who he is and what he feels and thinks. The right to make a mistake, make amends and move on.

Thanks for reading again today !

Take a number

I made enemies this week when I defended my son . My choice was defend him and risk making enemies or stand by quietly and risk losing my son and his respect and self esteem .

Swimming with one fin

Greetings Y'all ;
I just finished watching an exquisite sunrise this morning. I sat back and viewed the dawning of yet another new day filled with fresh hope and opportunities. As I quietly reflected on on my blessings I realized God treats us, or at least my son and I , pretty good. I am grateful for new days, my sons quirky and exuberant vitality, fresh coffee, seedless watermelons, and my genuine friends , among a host of other things.

This week it became apparent that the quality of friends outweighs the quantity of friends. I learned that stripping away empathy to get to the core can be painful but is necessary at times. Ironically I still feel sorry those who cause us grief, I feel sorry for their pain that causes them to say and do things.
No one is perfect, least of all me.

So let's talk about yesterday now. We , wait for it ..... went swimming ! It was all good , for awhile. Mowgli put forth a Phelpsian effort during five races with children five and six years his senior. The last race he really showboated, much to my chagrin and consternation. He gave them a head start then swam with one arm and still won. He has a strange habit of using one fin, odd little monkey . Those children left and he played with me , we played the baseball game- epic failure. More screaming,crying but when I turned to take a breather and collect myself and he grabbed me that ended the game. We calmed down and talked it out back in our flat. I realized I could have kept him there and let him work out the frustration but quite honestly that whole screaming whining thing is my kryptonite. My PTSD is still on the surface after this week.

We then took a run to Trader Joes for pizza crust and fruits. My little man wanted pineapple pizza and more watermelon. It's funny but he read 'Eat This Not That' out loud on the way to TJs , all through the store , while we loaded the car, on the way to the next store.... I realized I am not an auditory learner so I promised him I work on that. TJs was out of watermelon, no worries plan B Safeway had a special on them and was on the way home. Oops sold out :( ok ok uhm plan C - Target had a two day special on personal watermelons and it's on the way home . We got the last one , well last two but it seems Zander learned when daddy says stop goofing with the melon or it will drop and you keep goofing with the melon then you , or rather the melon , has a bad experience with gravity." Irv - clean up in aisle four "( from Mr.Mom). He manned up and called on the help phone to let them know it and told two workers . If you make a mistake , you make amends, then you move on.

We got back and returned to the pool where we played quite nicely and with much jocularity. Came home and relaxed with some good competitive sports viewing. We baseball and I made sure to point out each pitch every player has a choice- freak out or figure out. That is be so upset that their focus is gone or figure out what needs to be done. Gotta toss them little life lessons on whenever possible. We finished with homemade pizza ( my sauce failed miserably) while watching Michael Phelps go down in history. Well done young man. Naturally the night ended with snuggles and my singing our good night songs.

It's funny but junior mint did great with older kids and a little girl ( he very sweetly played with and guided her). It's a pattern I've seen for years and am repeatedly told is nice but he must learn to play with his peers. So what's our definition of peers? Olders have lived through what he is experiencing and have more patience plus he can communicate with them on an intellectual level. I'd said it's their patience and guidance that benefits him. Youngers are kids he can relate to who need help - now he can guide and help which boosts his self esteem. But what about children his age ?

So on this glorious new day I look forward to .....

Thanks for stopping by , checking in on us , and for reading once again.

A young mans public apology

Greetings yall :

Just a quick link to an article I read. Seems a young man thought it was ok to jump a que for a flight with his team. He was taught that no rule is too small to follow. I admire this young mans courage, the courage of his coach and the airline. His parents ought to be proud  of him for learning one of life's harder lessons- to accept responsibility for ones actions.

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-2183480/Mac-Breedlove-Coach-forces-high-school-lacrosse-player-apologise-ENTIRE-plane-passengers.html

The joy of exhaling

Greetings y'all ; 

Ahhh here it is, my brief and sadly unpaid summer break. Well I don't get any rupees but I get a chance to exhale and relax and regroup. I am blessed with that opportunity, many people don't get that . Manny folks don't have a job to get a break from. Many aren't fortunate enough to have the same schedule as their little people. 

We were amazingly relaxed yesterday. Was it because I stood up for and by my confused young un? Was it because we saw the light at the end of the tunnel ? I think, and remember I am man brained and blonde, he saw me voice our view, make a mistake in the way I did it , man up , make amends, and remain firm in my stance but move on.

Yesterday Commander Zander had a successful field day! He won and he lost and he moved on! Now reach way up high and pat yourself on your back. Kudos Kiddo ! I was lucky enough run the run the bases event ;to be in the middle of the baseball diamond for 2 1/2 hours of unshaded heat while the campers ran the bases and stirred up dust. I loved it ! Ok I had to judge the winners and I had to tell my progeny he lost his race. Oh no Ken,isn't  that a recipe for disaster? Nope it wasn't ! He fell on his knees and cried out NO ! I said get up son we show sportsmanship on this field - next two racers lets go! Junior mint got up and took his place back in the que without saying a word. ( gotta be honest I loved showing them how easy it is to redirect him then move on. No feeding into it ! Well played A-Rob ! )  

I guess listening to him scream and letting him work out it in the pool the day before paid off. He even accepted responsibility and redirection. There were some overly exuberant little people and I needed to remind him to be his own person and daddy's rule are to be followed regardless of others actions. Back to our moral compass. 

Ok so I have no segue here just another random train(wreck?) of thought. A meandering stream of consciousness ... After my dehydrating day I finally opened and drank my bottle of coconut water . I don't endorse many products on this here blog but I gotta tell ya Zico Pure Premium Coconut Water was amazing. I found it to be refreshing , tasty , rehydrating. Next time you need those electrolytes try that instead of the typical sugary sports drinks. I truly felt felt good after indulging. Oh yesterday was National Watermelon Day so yes I also indulged in some of that tasty red fruit. Quite tempting to live on watermelon and  coconut water and pineapple and .. Oh never mind . 

I woke up to a big cheesy smile in my face and a hearty "I Love You" yeah I think we will be ok.

Thanks for reading  again today . 

A better flight plan

Greetings y'all ;

Yesterday was actually a pretty good day for the Robinson Boys. Xander had a decent day at camp, until the very end- we are addressing the fact he has to face his punishment even if he has a good day . I truly am trying to work with him on this but it's difficult because it doesn't make sense to me. I inquired about it yesterday but was rather emotional and perhaps a tad forceful.

But what my child saw was his father get very angry and defend him. Defend his son with out yelling or hitting. But vociferously stand by him. I lost a friend when I made a comparison of how different staff and children are treated differently. Hence why I try not to mix friends with co-workers.

Listen folks that camp has great potential. There are some wonderful staff members. It's for kids with special needs . My son is diagnosed with quirky and exuberant err ADHD . He is not perfect but he's got separation anxiety and doesn't need to forced away from me. He understands our roles during the day. He gets it. He doesn't feel entitled because I work there but feels more punished. He sees how others are treated versus himself. I suppose I feel frustrated that my voice as a parent was muted.

So those are selfish feelings formed from my perspective. Right or wrong they are mine . As I give validity to every sentient being so to do I seek or wish for validity for my feelings and thoughts. I know sounding off won't solve the problem though.

Meanwhile back at the ranch ....

After the incident at work we came home and swam...and swam and swam.... We're Pisces -its what we do and its great therapy. We played and laughed. I forced myself to give him a lesson in life and in sports.

We had several races in the pool and I won most of them. He accepted that. We played a form of baseball as well. I learned my child needs to be taught the rules of baseball. He did not like striking out or getting out or me getting runs. He screamed and cried and wailed and I calmly helped him navigate through the storm. He has to be the captain of that ship and and learned to get through it. The lifeguard was understandably irritated listening to my son scream, but he understood that I was teaching a lesson. At one point we took a brief time out and I had man cub raise on arm up in the air over his head ( this was we feel like like when we hit the ball, score a run , etc...) then drop the other arm by his side ( this is what we feel like when we get a strike or the other is successful) . I asked if he could fly like that? His response " no daddy that's just silly " next I asked him to show me how wings look that can fly. He held is arms straight out in a nice line from finger tip across his shoulder to his other finger tips. Naturally my next query was which way is best for a successful endeavor ? Really high then really low and continue that vacillation? Or maintain equilibrium while soaring ? He chose "B" ...good boy ! Amazing he didn't have to sit out or get yelled at. It was a teachable moment with out punishment. Only natural consequences and it worked. Not gonna lie he has field day today and may get upset. It's not the losing it's the fact that he likes he try again and again until he masters something and is successful with it.

I continued to play hard, be calm and firm when I was successful and when he was not . The little bugger ended up beating me fair and square. I loved it! Sportsmanship can be a difficult lesson to learn. We've a long row to hoe but at least we have a better flight plan and visual and physical cue to helps us maintain our steady altitude.

Another bonus to staying at the pool late was a friend showed up with fresh picked cucumbers and tomatoes and shared his harvest. Guess who had pasta and über fresh gravy for dinner? Hmm perhaps tonight is salsa night?

I may have lost a summer job for next year. I definitely lost support from some co-workers and a potential friend. But last night Junior Mint said " you're a gold medal dad because you defend me and coach me" dang it little dude - you always seem to know how to wrap your little fingers around my heart.

We will take these lessons we have learned and use them to strengthen ourselves.

Thanks for reading folks !

Fishing with spider silk

Greetings y'all :

So how was your day yesterday? Did you offer any random acts of kindness ? Did you accept any random acts of kindness? Did you seek the beauty in little things? Did the the beauty in little things seek you ?

Me ? I had an unusually take no prisoners, put my boot up life's tuchus , Carpe Diem attitude . Oh I remained civil but, but little meek me , you know the one who shows strength through kindness , remained flexible , strong and unbreakable. Imagine if you will ( yes my homage to The Twilight Zone) a strong oak in a storm - it can snap . Compare that to a flexible and strong willow. Every body knows steel is strong but who knows that spider silk is actually stronger ?

So come get caught in my web of love , kindness, flexibility and strength. If my web is torn asunder I merely rebuild it. I repair it nightly. I call it mindful reflection , open and honest assessment of my life, my day, my choices.

Hold Ken- isn't this here blog about parenting you so called quirky and exuberant man cub? We all know he's ADHD and you're in denial. He's probably just a bad kid with a bad parent, so get over yourself.

Ok thanks for the interjection! You're right this is about me and my shadow. So watch this seque if I may return to my posting.

In reflecting over the chart of our last few weeks I realized I let rocky shoals deter me from bringing my progeny into a safe harbor. I fought the barrier, railed and tilted against the proverbial windmills rather than charting a course around unmovable obstacles. I almost ran us ashore and wrecked us by letting emotion take the helm.

Yesterday morn I awoke with a fire in my belly to keep us afloat , to follow the brilliant frenzel lens of the light house showing us more courses to reach our destination. I remembered to take the helm and calmly look for solutions and know life is not a straight line. By being the captain again I allowed my first mate to feel relaxed and comfortable. Steady as she goes ....

Ok boat analogy out of the way , but didn't you begin this blog yammering about willows and spider webs ? Yep - wow you are quite astute and inquisitive today ( and perhaps a tad impatient weed hopper) So here goes ....

I love me some willows! I am man enough to admit I find comfort in the long fingered branches that reach down to tickle us. The move with the wind and don't fight it. Watch a weeping willow dance in a hurricane or t storm and then tell me you aren't touched by its grace under pressure. Spider webs? They are so strong the US navy is working on a way to use them to replace the steel catch cables on air craft carriers. They to sway in storms and if torn are readily replaced. Who here has the ability or fortitude to rebuild nightly? But spider webs are also sticky. They catch everything and the spider does housework to maintain the webs integrity. Kinda like our minds- purge the negative thoughts folks.

In, I believe, New Guinea there is dying tradition. Only a few elders know how to do this successfully. They collect the silk from a certain spider and wind it in such a way as to create a ball. This is then attached to a home made kite and string. They then get in their dug out canoe and paddle out into the sea. The kite is sailed and the ball of silk is left dancing across or rather just below the surface. They actually catch fish with out a hook with this method- the silk is strong and sticky therefore once the fish bites onto it is caught. Like all catches the fish is taken back and shared with the village that evening.

So my challenge to day is to let my child into my web- see the good and embrace the sanity of life , to remain flexible and happy as the willow with a strong trunk. To calmly navigate my child through rocky waters and remember to let him play and explore once we arrive safely ashore.

Thanks for reading about us today!

Dichotomy

Greetings y'all :
Yesterday is in the books. I have three more days of camp then a few weeks to realigned my son. Not mincing words today, if weren't desperate for the money we'd be done with camp.

The word of the day is dichotomy. I would have preferred it to be equality or accountability but it's not .

I'm truly at a loss a words this morning . I have a myriad of thoughts and feelings and would ordinarily just begin with the facts. However, just like his old man, my sons facts don't seem to be what others want to her or accept.

" Every sentient being deserves to be free of suffering and to find happiness" HH Dalai Lama
Let's hope reality sets in an m voice for my child is actually heard. I've known him for over eight years , I just might know what works for him.

Gotta run, time for me to go help students be better individuals based on who they are and what they need. I enjoy helping them feel valid.

Thanks for reading !