Forgiveness and accepting humanity

Greetings y'all ,

It's Easter, Passover, Sunday whatever you call it. Twould be easy to post a pious piece of prose but I want to focus on forgiveness and humanity. In the human condition forgiveness may be one of the hardest ideals to obtain. Forgiveness of others overt misdeed towards us, of what we perceive as blatant personalized attacks on us , of ourselves for a myriad of reasons. In the end we are humans attempting to find happiness and to be free of suffering.

Letting go and releasing anger , vengeance , self righteous sense of revenge and indignity is difficult . I suggest not trusting anyone who states otherwise , but I could be wrong. I am after all human. I find comfort in remembering life is impermanent , pain passes as does joy. Many who harm us are truly suffering and are acting out. Oft times in ignorance or insecurity. The key , in my humble opinion is to focus on a positive aspect of that individual.

In my personal life I've been jumping through hoops because I failed to do that. Oh sure I did it occasionally but not steadily . Do I expect the situation to change? No I do not. Holding on to expectations leads to suffering as well. My best bet is to hope to ease my suffering , I've no control over the other parties. Sadly though these adults are acting out and retarding the growth of my child. All the more reason to move forward with quiet inner calm and a peaceful heart.

When I started following my own advice I was able to rationally see my child for who he is and remember all his positive attributes. It's well documented that his classmates are not his peers. Peers is not age specific. He has some things in common and much to learn from these classmates. But he can't communicate with them the way he can with olders. I feel his pain.

Growing up I felt like an outsider because I had little in common with those my own age. I was more comfortable with adults and older kids. So I see my son having a hard row to hoe until he reaches that point in the American education system that age is irrelevant.

You see he is human being suffering from the human condition of institutionalized and industrialized factory style education. My heart aches for him. The bonus is I have traveled that road and I " get" him. He's not ADHD or anything else the schools and system wish to label him because he's a kinesthetic global thinker. Just as a parent ought to love the child they have not the child they want an educator ought teach the child they have not the child they want. It's not that hard .

Quite honestly and at the risk of sounding egotistical I have consciously brought more love and laughter into my life. Into my classroom and my home. I've seen positive growth in both settings. Be the captain of the ship and continue to steer the vessel with quiet inner calm. If we stop to address and consequence every little behavior , either positive or negative , then we give the nautical wheel over to the child and are rudderless. If we pick and choose and state what is expected once then follow up without extended discourse we stay the course with less negative interactions. That does not in any way mean discount the child's voice when appropriate. All sentient beings seek validation. But know when reflective listening is best or allowing the child to steer occasionally to help validate the individual and reduce anxiety .

Ok maybe I did get preachy and pious. I apologize - I'm only human. Remember I live with a wonderfully quirky and exuberant man cub. A child who is wires differently but is amazing .